The appetite that fades with age fades quietly. There is no dramatic day when a parent stops eating — there is a smaller breakfast, half a lunch, and a year later the trousers no longer fit and nobody can name when it started.

What helps at the table

  • Smaller portions more often — five small meals are accepted where three full ones are refused
  • Food that is easy to chew, since an untreated dental problem is one of the most common causes
  • Stronger flavours: a squeeze of lime, more aromatics, more herbs — taste dulls with age
  • A fortified milk drink or an egg between meals, which adds nutrition without a plate
  • Eating with someone. Appetite is social, and a person who eats alone eats less

The social point is not sentimental. In care settings, the single most reliable way to raise food intake is to seat people together at a shared table. The same dish, eaten alone at 11am in an empty kitchen, is far less likely to be finished than the identical dish eaten at a table with two other people.

Do not argue about the food. Argue about the eating company, and the food tends to resolve itself.

Questions readers ask

Should I give supplements or a fortified drink?
A fortified milk drink or an oral nutrition supplement can help bridge a gap, and it is worth asking a dietitian which one suits, because the choice depends on kidney function, diabetes and what else is being taken. Treat it as an addition to meals rather than a replacement — a supplement that replaces dinner is a net loss.
What if the doctor finds nothing wrong?
Then the practical route is to raise the calorie density of what is eaten rather than the volume: more egg, more oil in the cooking, full-fat milk, ground nuts in the sauces. A smaller plate carrying more energy is easier to finish than a large plate of low-density food. Ask to be referred to a dietitian rather than working it out alone.

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